Losing, Down and Out

We are being governed with a philosophy of extremes. 

Watching the political theater being performed across the county, this is sad. Age and reason tell us that governing from the far edge results in flawed and short sighted action. Yet even more distressing is that the majority of “regular folk” (as I consider myself) feel impotent to weigh in and, even better, have an impact in any substantive way.

I'm not really the kind of girl who embraces extremes.  Extremes are rigid and unrealistic. In my experience, life rarely exists in extremes:  almost always there’s a healthy dose of good in bad; a blend of pain in joy; invariably some wrong in right and right in wrong.  Maybe it’s the Gemini in me…but I believe that the primary purpose of polar opposites is the space between them.   

Here are a few of the extremes stressing me right now:

"Winners and "Losers" - Political races are decided by votes: whoever gets the most votes wins. However, after the victory celebration, the concept of winning and losing should end.  Yet observing the actions and attitudes of way too many politicians-of all stripes – confirm that they took this win/loss concept to work with them, focusing their time and energy (and if we’re lucky, some intellect) on making sure that they and the people who voted for them continue to “win”.   The strategy is working for them and its working for their supporters. But in the end, we all lose.

"Top" and "Bottom" – It’s easy to see the folks who are on “top” right now: their voices (sometimes screeching, sometimes deafening) are vociferous, resounding from podiums and across the airwaves; their perspectives elevated and affirmed.  And then there are those on the “bottom” – whose voices have been muted or relegated to angry outbursts. Forced to the underside, their avenues to conceive or share their truth are restricted and their energy depleted.

"In" and "Out" –  The “inner circle”, the select whose perspectives are valued and promoted; inside players with the privileged access and protection that we all seek and deserve.   Everybody else is an “outsiders”--with spotty or no admission to the same security and advantage; these are the people who find out too little too late to shape the dialogue and outcome.  

There are too many on the wrong side of these extremes with no consistent opportunities to address this dynamic through discussion and mutual problem solving. And Social media, while effective in provoking dialogue, and mobilizing for immediate action (Sign a petition! Call your legislator! Meet at the Square!), is some but not all of the answer.  Though social media we might occasionally peek into others’ worlds, but most of our play occurs with folks who believe and act and live like us. More significantly, at least in my experience to date, social media doesn’t incubate collective, cumulative learning, interaction and growth.

As a part of my sabbatical, I have intentionally sought to interact with people that I wouldn’t normally connect with-live and virtually-so that I can expose myself to different perspectives.  I’m feeling my impotence being transformed into power in places and spaces where I find myself with different folks who have different perspectives and are leading different lives. Of course, I recognize that the distinctions aren’t as extremes as I might have believed. Best, it is helping me to reconcile, rebut, confirm, and/or affirm what I think and feel and want for my life.

Try it!  Go someplace different and talk to the unusual suspect. Seek out someone who might be losing even if you think you’re winning; someone who looks like they’re on top when you’re feeling you or your friends are down and out. Put yourself in a position to hear and learn something you didn’t expect… and see if you might start to move from your extremes to the middle.  

Cause in the middle is the heart of the matter.  And that’s a good place to start.